Sunday, June 7, 2009
A Sheltered World
I used to be friends with a very devout Muslim mother. She's really young but already has 3 young girls, and keeps an active blog that's complete with adorable pictures of her little girls doing silly things such as dancing, singing, and telling children's stories. She keeps her own blog, which is filled with motherhood stories and almost flawless writing. Lately, I've been feeling the need to revert back to piety. Perhaps her seemingly perfect, sheltered world comes as a result of her devotion to Allah. I want that...very much. My world could be that, maybe, with the right amount of Islam. But I've been too beaten down and disillusioned by the Muslims I've known. My world is brimming over with negativity and untrustworthy people.
Hiatus...what a pattern
I do this with every journal/blog I have ever had. I update once every few months. I really do want to update more often but I often end up discussing mind-disturbing issues on gchat with friends. Maybe I should stop being so open about things. Sometimes, in the middle of conversations, I find myself wondering if the things I say are complete boring, idiotic trash to some of these people. I mean, I suppose if something didn't involve me, I wouldn't really care all that much. But maybe that's just the selfish bitch in me talking.
I think my next school is going to be the one that offered me a position right on the spot. That was pretty awesome, and I had felt positive vibes while I was there. However, because my current school is discriminatory and run by mean-spirited asinine bastards, I can't exactly tell them that I'm leaving. My new principal says that it's okay that I wait but I'm nervous about not having been officially accepted. I have 15 work days left, and I can hardly wait. Someone told me to focus on the light at the end of the tunnel. I described it more as a blazing sun and the reason why I'm still so depressed is because I can't look directly look at the light or else, I risk the fate of Tiresias. (You know...that blind guy in Oedipus Rex)
For some unknown reason, my administration changed all my failing kids to passing kids. It's actually a violation of our teacher rights to change grades without our consent. I went up to my AP and spoke rather rudely: "So basically, all my failing kids are now passing kids? Why is that?" She was eating peanuts at the time and started smacking her lips louder. In her nasty, ghetto voice, she tells me, "It is what it is."
I asked her what that was supposed to mean and she says, "You wanna come at me? I'll come right back at you."
What? Is she one of the kids now? My principal stepped in and they tried to explain the change in my grades as an alignment to their ELA test scores. Could they not come up with a better lie? Everyone knows that test scores don't have to align with classroom effort. These people really want to play me for a fool. How stupid do they think us teachers are?
If my school could be a little more professional, maybe teachers like T wouldn't get away with coming to work fifteen minutes to half an hour late on a consistent basis. T arrived to work 2 hours late and came back from lunch 2 hours late on our professional development day. When I tried to chastise him on his unprofessionalism, he blatantly tells me, "I don't care." This is the kind of people we have educating our kids. I am scared for the upcoming generation, and hope that if I raise children in this sort of world, that they never be exposed to these people until later on in life when they know what's what.
I think my next school is going to be the one that offered me a position right on the spot. That was pretty awesome, and I had felt positive vibes while I was there. However, because my current school is discriminatory and run by mean-spirited asinine bastards, I can't exactly tell them that I'm leaving. My new principal says that it's okay that I wait but I'm nervous about not having been officially accepted. I have 15 work days left, and I can hardly wait. Someone told me to focus on the light at the end of the tunnel. I described it more as a blazing sun and the reason why I'm still so depressed is because I can't look directly look at the light or else, I risk the fate of Tiresias. (You know...that blind guy in Oedipus Rex)
For some unknown reason, my administration changed all my failing kids to passing kids. It's actually a violation of our teacher rights to change grades without our consent. I went up to my AP and spoke rather rudely: "So basically, all my failing kids are now passing kids? Why is that?" She was eating peanuts at the time and started smacking her lips louder. In her nasty, ghetto voice, she tells me, "It is what it is."
I asked her what that was supposed to mean and she says, "You wanna come at me? I'll come right back at you."
What? Is she one of the kids now? My principal stepped in and they tried to explain the change in my grades as an alignment to their ELA test scores. Could they not come up with a better lie? Everyone knows that test scores don't have to align with classroom effort. These people really want to play me for a fool. How stupid do they think us teachers are?
If my school could be a little more professional, maybe teachers like T wouldn't get away with coming to work fifteen minutes to half an hour late on a consistent basis. T arrived to work 2 hours late and came back from lunch 2 hours late on our professional development day. When I tried to chastise him on his unprofessionalism, he blatantly tells me, "I don't care." This is the kind of people we have educating our kids. I am scared for the upcoming generation, and hope that if I raise children in this sort of world, that they never be exposed to these people until later on in life when they know what's what.
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